Blog: Work/life balance: looking after ourselves so we can do our best work
Hi, I’m Oluwaseun Olushola, a PhD researcher in applied mathematics at the University of Birmingham.
When people talk about work/life balance, it can sometimes sound like a neat formula: work hard, rest well, repeat. But I don’t think it’s that simple. At least, it hasn’t been that simple for me.
For a long time, I didn’t really value work/life balance in the way I should have. I thought it was enough to get some sleep, keep pushing, and rely on coffee or energy drinks to carry me through the rest. I was more focused on getting things done than asking whether the way I was living was actually sustainable. Looking back now, I can see that I treated rest as something optional rather than necessary.
Over time, my thinking has changed. I now believe that the healthier you are, the more capable you are at your work. Looking after ourselves isn’t separate from success. In many ways, it’s one of the things that makes success sustainable. We often take care of the things we depend on most. Machines are serviced. Systems are checked. Problems are addressed before they become serious. In the same way, we also need to learn to listen to our bodies and minds and respond to what they need.
Balance means different things to different people
One of the biggest misconceptions I want to challenge is the idea that work/life balance has one fixed definition. It does not. What balance looks like for one person may not look the same for someone else, and even for the same person, it can change over time.
That’s something I have only properly begun to understand in recent years. Even rest is not one simple thing. Different people need different forms of rest, and what feels restorative in one season of life may not feel the same in another. That’s why self-discovery matters. Work/life balance isn’t about copying someone else’s routine or chasing a perfect formula. It is about learning what genuinely helps you stay mentally, emotionally, and physically well.
Learning the cost of getting it wrong
I grew up in a setting where academics were placed on a very high pedestal. During my undergraduate degree, success felt like something that had to be achieved by any means necessary. That meant sacrificing much of my social life and giving so much of myself to academic work that there was very little room left for anything else.
I still believe in hard work. I still believe in discipline and dedication. But by the time I reached my final year at university, I was already overwhelmed and mentally drained very early in the academic year. From that point onward, I felt like I was dragging myself towards the finish line.
What made that period especially difficult was that, in the end, I felt like I had lost on both sides. I fell short of my own academic expectations, and at the same time, I didn’t really enjoy those university years socially either. Looking back, the warning signs were there: a lack of motivation, a deep tiredness that made it feel like I needed to sleep for days, and noticeable weight loss. My body was clearly saying that something was not right.
I also know that one of the things that pushes me out of balance is wanting to get tasks done quickly to get them off my mind. I like writing lists. I like crossing things out. In moderation, that is useful. It keeps me organised. But taken too far, it can create a constant sense of urgency, and that urgency can quietly become unhealthy.
What balance looks like for me now
These days, I think of balance less as perfection and more as awareness. It’s about noticing what my body and mind can handle and responding honestly rather than just forcing myself through everything.
For me, that looks like trying to protect my sleep and get seven to eight hours when I can. It looks like spending quality time with my closest friends, because laughter and genuine connection lighten life for me. It looks like going on long walks to clear my head, listening to my orchestral playlist, and journalling to process what is going on internally.
To me, a balanced week is one where I feel good on the inside and proud of what I’ve accomplished. I’m still learning that productivity isn’t just about how much I can force out of myself. Sometimes, with a well-rested mind and body, I can actually work much better and much faster. And when life becomes intense and balance isn’t fully possible, I try to take things one day at a time.
Work/life balance is not a straightforward path, because life itself is not straightforward. Unexpected things happen, pressure builds, and there will be seasons when balance feels harder to maintain. But I’ve learned that being aware of our mental health and being intentional about looking after ourselves is a powerful step in the right direction. We often do our best work not when we ignore ourselves, but when we care for ourselves well enough to keep showing up fully.
If you’re struggling with stress or finding a healthy work/life balance, the Time to Talk? page shares support to help you cope, and the University Doctoral School also offers dedicated PGR Wellbeing Support.